Archive for March 7th, 2007

Mar 07 2007

Enough.

Posted by: Mike in Uncategorized

Alright. I’ve had enough. This cold weather and show shit is for the birds. It’s 50, it’s 30, it’s 60, it’s 15, 40, 20… ENOUGH. The stupid groundhog said spring is coming. Mr. Groundhog, you’re fired. I have shit to do:

Cars

  • Transmission on the Escort
  • Struts for the Escort
  • Rear Disc Conversion for the Escort
  • Lots of fiberglass practice for body work

    • House

  • My tub is still cracked and it’s getting worse every day
  • HER shit is still all over. Every time I think I’m making headway, there’s more. It’s so unnerving to go through it, and it hurts. A lot.
  • I want to paint but I need the ventilation and it was FIFTEEN DEGREES today.

    • Life

  • Financials are getting better. They’re not quite where I’m comfortable, but J<3 is helping me keep my head together with cash flow
  • Continue to accept. Zie is walking now and almost talking. I’m seeing her more often, which is a double edge sword. It makes me cry, yet makes me warm inside. I miss my baby girl.
  • I’ve decided I’m going to hike–a lot– when it gets warmer than FIFTEEN. J<3 and I went out last weekend to High Rocks. I haven't been there since I was with Teh E. It's my go away place. I never took HER. She didn't deserve it. She raped everything in my life and took it all away from me. She ruined me.

    • Now I struggle to give J<3 my all and I feel I fail from time to time even though she tells me I don’t. Things between us are absolutely great. J<3 and I have this connection I’ve never felt before. When I’m thinking of her, my phone rings or I get a text, it’s really weird. There’s this energy that we share, and we play with it. It’s great, I feel like I’ve always known her, even though it’s only been a few short months.

    Alas, I am sad. She feels she’s a bad girlfriend, but I don’t know why. She respects me. She makes me laugh. She’s very open with me. She’s my everything, everything I’ve always looked for in a woman. Just for the record, her “bad girlfriend” statement isn’t one of those “Babe, we need to talk” bad girlfriend moments. It’s TOTALLY not like that. But I don’t think I’m able to explain it through text on a website. -end-

    I’m afraid for Zie. She’s being well taken care of…physically, but I fear where her mind is going. I can only hope that her mind is being stimulated sufficiently. This scares me to no end. I know how they have provided for every child that has ever lived there, but now it’s MY child living there. I’m not comfortable with that. I’m never going to let them take advantage of MY daughter the way they’ve always used their kids. It wont happen. They’re afraid of me. And they should be. I will make sure nothing of the sorts happens. I have friends. Powerful friends, nay, powerful lawyers.

    I don’t know how much longer I can keep running this 10-16 hour workday. It’s really starting to wreak havoc on me. I’m ALWAYS tired. My weekends consist of doing nothing. It’s killing me. *ugh* I better get compensated for this. SOON.

    I hate the fucking cold, but I love the snow!

      
    Mood : brrr

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