You know, day in and day out I sit at work listening to a local radio station. Mind you, most people understand my dislike for the crap they play on the radio they call music. But that’s not the focus of this.
Currently the station I’m listening to is running a bracket competition of musicians called the MM-ARCH Madness (heh, very clever) where they play blocks of two bands and the listeners call or text in with their vote as to who moves on. Metallica is out on round two. Tom Petty knocked them out. TOM. FUCKING. PETTY. Not mind you, I’m not much of a Metallica fan anymore, but come on. The people who listen to the radio never cease to amaze me. But that’s not the focus of this.
Why?!
OH WHY?!
Do they only play music for 20 minutes then 30 minutes of commercials? But that’s not the focus of this.
The focus of this is a question. Just a simple question. DO THESE FUCKING MARKETING PEOPLE EVER LISTEN TO THEIR FUCKING COMMERCIALS?!?!?!?!?!!!!!1111
Every marketing rep needs to be tied to a chair and listen to their commercial 400 times over the course of an 8 hour day. Then they need to repeat that for 1 week. If they haven’t committed suicide by the end of the regime, then the commercial should go to air. I. CAN’T. STAND. How annoying most of these commercials are. I would never purchase any product based on a commercial I can’t stand.
“But you remember the product because you hate the commercial for it so it works!” you might say. Incorrect. I am less likely to remember something I can’t stand because I have no idea what the hell IT is. When I dislike it, I either change the channel, turn it off, or tune it out.
In conclusion, I am happy to report that I take pleasure knowing that the advertising company just lost money on me which in turn makes me sad that those lost funds didn’t make it into my pocket. 
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In my last post I wrote how I was concerned for the mental state of my daughter. I had her on Sunday and I have seen that her intelligence level is significantly higher than most children her age. She’s a year and 3 months now and navigating stairs and following voices to find someone in another room. There are a lot of other little subtle things that she does to show that she is indeed very bright. Her future is in her own hands. I just hope her mother realizes this and HELPS her along. That leaves quite a bit to be desired so I will do what I can.
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Alright. I’ve had enough. This cold weather and show shit is for the birds. It’s 50, it’s 30, it’s 60, it’s 15, 40, 20… ENOUGH. The stupid groundhog said spring is coming. Mr. Groundhog, you’re fired. I have shit to do:
Cars
Transmission on the Escort
Struts for the Escort
Rear Disc Conversion for the Escort
Lots of fiberglass practice for body work
House
My tub is still cracked and it’s getting worse every day
HER shit is still all over. Every time I think I’m making headway, there’s more. It’s so unnerving to go through it, and it hurts. A lot.
I want to paint but I need the ventilation and it was FIFTEEN DEGREES today.
Life
Financials are getting better. They’re not quite where I’m comfortable, but J<3 is helping me keep my head together with cash flow
Continue to accept. Zie is walking now and almost talking. I’m seeing her more often, which is a double edge sword. It makes me cry, yet makes me warm inside. I miss my baby girl.
I’ve decided I’m going to hike–a lot– when it gets warmer than FIFTEEN. J<3 and I went out last weekend to High Rocks. I haven't been there since I was with Teh E. It's my go away place. I never took HER. She didn't deserve it. She raped everything in my life and took it all away from me. She ruined me.
Now I struggle to give J<3 my all and I feel I fail from time to time even though she tells me I don’t. Things between us are absolutely great. J<3 and I have this connection I’ve never felt before. When I’m thinking of her, my phone rings or I get a text, it’s really weird. There’s this energy that we share, and we play with it. It’s great, I feel like I’ve always known her, even though it’s only been a few short months.
Alas, I am sad. She feels she’s a bad girlfriend, but I don’t know why. She respects me. She makes me laugh. She’s very open with me. She’s my everything, everything I’ve always looked for in a woman. Just for the record, her “bad girlfriend” statement isn’t one of those “Babe, we need to talk” bad girlfriend moments. It’s TOTALLY not like that. But I don’t think I’m able to explain it through text on a website. -end-
I’m afraid for Zie. She’s being well taken care of…physically, but I fear where her mind is going. I can only hope that her mind is being stimulated sufficiently. This scares me to no end. I know how they have provided for every child that has ever lived there, but now it’s MY child living there. I’m not comfortable with that. I’m never going to let them take advantage of MY daughter the way they’ve always used their kids. It wont happen. They’re afraid of me. And they should be. I will make sure nothing of the sorts happens. I have friends. Powerful friends, nay, powerful lawyers.
I don’t know how much longer I can keep running this 10-16 hour workday. It’s really starting to wreak havoc on me. I’m ALWAYS tired. My weekends consist of doing nothing. It’s killing me. *ugh* I better get compensated for this. SOON.
I hate the fucking cold, but I love the snow!
Mood : brrr
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